Up Scheidt Creek

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TRIVIA:

Alfred Hitchcock was notoriously hard on actors. He was once quoted as saying, “Actors are cattle”—a quip that stirred up a huge outcry. In response, he issued this correction: “I have been misquoted. What I really said is, ‘Actors should be treated as cattle.’”

…I think I seen one a his pictures oncet. All bout folks inna a boat wearin swimwear what were jes indecent. Back in my day, ya actually covered somethin up when ya put on a swimsuit. These here days, one sneeze an’ t’ secret is revealed. Nasty, that. Ain’t no sense in iut atall. If yer gonna skinnydip, jes do it an do be foolin bout it.

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TRIVIA:

The concept of “community service” as a form of probation originated in Alameda County, California, in 1966. It was first used as an alternative “punishment” for female traffic offenders.

…ya askin me, which ya are, that there community service jes be a way fer em ta git work outa folks so’s they don’ hafta pay ta keep em. Then they kin spend t’ tax money on nonsense thangs, like that there new playground down inna valley. Bet them new swing sets alone cost em a arm an a leg. And they ain’t no better than a tire on a rope, which we gits fer free. T’ tired be more fum anyhow, from what I be recollectin’.

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TRIVIA:

The popular game Bingo was originally called “Beano” because players used beans to cover the numbered squares.

…y’know, Beano be that thang they sell ta put in yer beans when ya cook em ta keep ya from gittin t’ vapors. They sells it down t’ th’ general store. It be right onna shelf next ta what they decided were t’ best acne treatment. Wonder if that means t’ stuff gives ya zits. Don’ matter none, nohow. Ain’t no point buyin somethin ta keep gas off. Gas passes on it’s own, right enough. Waste a money, that.

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TRIVIA:

King James IV of Scotland was an amateur dentist, and even paid people to let him to practice on their teeth.

…Yech. Ain’t no tooth quack gittin hos hands in MY mouth, even if they be payin me. Don understand why folks would. I done read one time where there be big stars what hires them jet charter places ta git em over ta France er somewhere jes ta git they teeth drilled on, but not me. No way, no how.

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TRIVIA:

The letter J was the last letter added to the English Alphabet. Before that, the letter I was used in its place. U was the second last letter added, and usually replaced by V.

…make ya wonder how anyone ever read anythin, don’ it? Bet it seem like a little kid were writin, no matter who really done it. Like, I seen the birthday invitations Cousin Mamie’s grandbaby sent out last year. She insisted on writin em her own self, an she were only six. It’s a mercy any folks even figgered out where ta git ta th’ party, that’s what.

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TRIVIA:

If your morning commute to work is 20 minutes or less, it’s below the national average. New Yorkers have some of the longest commutes, averaging 40 minutes.

…yeah, an wi’ gas prices what they is, them city folks got it t’ worst. Round here, we know how ta handle high gas prices. Ride a horse. T’ price a hay been purty steady fer years. I hear tell them city folks is dealin wi’ a lot over them long commutes an gas prices. Er were that them blame fool credit cards causin it? Dang if I kin recollect jes now. But they be dealin wi a lot a foreclosure an sech over it, I heard it on t’ radio t’other day. That ain’t much of a problem round here, neither.

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TRIVIA:

Ken Osmond, the actor behind Leave It to Beaver’s Eddie Haskell, wasn’t the troublemaker in real life. He grew up to become an L.A. policeman.

…an they think them cops out there ain’t troublemakers? Ha. But it be better n’ some a them old actors an singers. Cousin Martha, she allus be goin down ta Reno fer t’ gamblin machines, she done tole me all about how she keep seein outa work actors an singers an sech down there doin shows way after no one ever hears of em no more. She ain’t gonna be goin back no time soon though. She still be gittin over t’ last trip, where she done got t’ bedbugs outa one a them reno hotels she allus be stayin at. Says she be switchin ta Tunica from now on.

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TRIVIA:

Bob Dylan got his musicians drunk for the recording of “Rainy Day Women #12 and 35″ because, as he claimed, they were too stiff.

….seems I recollect that there name, but I cain’t rilly think a where from. Seem like he mighta been one a them hippy singers, like back inna sixties? Y’know, that hippy thang kinda skipped t’ hills… I do recollect goin down ta th’ city oncet, an seein everone havin real long hair an drivin them little Volkswagon Bug cars, all painted funny, an some a em had weird stuff on em, like Cadillac grills on t’ front where t’ Volkkswagon shoulda been round. Yeah, I member that. I member thinkin them cars woulden be able ta pull theyselves out one medium size chuck hole up where I lived.

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TRIVIA:

Walter Koenig, who played Chekov on TV’s Star Trek, had to wear a shaggy toupee in his first season until his real hair grew out. Reportedly, his mop-topped character was modeled after The Monkees singer Davy Jones in an attempt to lure teenage viewers.

…I recollect that there show. Seen it oncet er twicet down ta Cousin Mable’s. If I be right about what one he were, he be t’ one wi’ his hair all doin flip flops cause a t’ way it looked, kinda like a shaggy hound what jes been inna wind storm. But Davy Jones, ain’t he that drowned guy what all t’ sailers be watchin out fer? I don’ recollect t’ hair lookin like seaweed, an I cain’t figger why that would be makin young girls swoon, neither. Don’ make sense.

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TRIVIA:

Enacted in 1953, an Ohio law states that no person shall be arrested on the Fourth of July nor on a Sunday, while going to/from a designated place of worship.

…they be actin like that be a strange idear. Make perfect sense ta me. Folks oughter be safe goin to an from t’ church house, no matter what else they done. An think on, what iffen they be after t’ preacher? There they is, he finishes up, an all t’ folks watch t’ speaker mount his horse er whatever he come on, then he gits arrested. Kinda puts a damper on t’ whole thang, don’ it?

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