Up Scheidt Creek

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TRIVIA:

Anyone under the age of 21 who takes out household trash containing even a single empty alcohol beverage container can be charged with illegal possession of alcohol in Missouri….

…prolly be a good thang most folks ain’t livin’ in Misouri, then. Leastaways t’ ones round here. Boys round here still sneak inta they pappy’s shine sometimes. Some a them down valley way gitrs real upset when they kid comes home all wobbly an throwin up on they nice fancy bathroom vanities an sech. Up here in t’ hills, we jes figger t’ headache they gonna wake up wi’ be teachin em a lesson, an t’ trouble they be in fer filchin t’ shine be nother. Don’ usually happen more’n oncet.

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TRIVIA:

The word “toast,” meaning a wish of good health, started in ancient Rome, where a piece of toasted bread was dropped into wine.

…they musta been done pickled when they was a puttin’ it in there, too. Cain’t think a no other reason fer wantin’ a buncha soggy crumbs in what ya be drinkin. Round here when they be tippin whiskey, they jes takes off, winds up in some cheap hotel Las Vegas way. Then they be wakin up broke an wonderin’ where they is. But it be easier ta explain then bread in yer cup, toasted er otherwise.

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TRIVIA:

Actor Rob Lowe, playing in an Iowa celebrity golf tournament, hit and killed a flying goldfinch (Iowa’s state bird) with an approach shot to the fourth green at Glen Oaks Country Club in West Des Moines.

…bet t’ rest a his game went over like a turd inna punchbowl after that there stunt. Reckon they even let him finish? Never heard a him, no way. Right now, I be more worried bout my grandkid. He be upstairs wi’ a nasty headache from slammin can agin his head ta crush em ta impress his girl. He come here an tole me bout it, an I gived his head another thump an sent him ta bed. What ever got inta him, thinin he were ba human can crusher. Girls bein round shore makes boys addlepated.

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TRIVIA:

Robots have evolved to the point where they’re now communicating with each other. At the Swiss Federal Institute of Technology, an experiment was created where robots learned traits which helped each other. Some robots, unfortunately, evolved into “cheaters” which learned to lie to one another.

…I be putry sure I seen that in a horror movie oncet. All these robots runnin’ round playin’ like they was dumb but they was plottin ta take over t’ world. Even had these here women lookin ones, what looked real, all runnin around in skimpy lil sexy corsets and makin t’ menfolks lose they minds. I didden know that there movie were true!

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TRIVIA:

The odds are 1 out of 88,025 (.001136%) that you will die in an avalance in the next decade, if you live in Colorado.

…well, ain’t THAT a cheery thought. Where d’ they GIT these thangs, anyhw? I be havin’ no thoughts a movin ta Colorado no way. Ain’t plannin on movin nowhere, in spite a all them ads I keep gittin inna mail fer Cincinatti apartment finders an New York movers. But iffen I ever DID wanna move, y’ kin be shore it ain’t gonna be ta Colorado, now, cain’t ya. Durn snow deep enuff round here wi’ out goin where it comes down ta attack ya.

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TRIVIA:

Venezuelan Interior Minister Pedro Carreno gave a speech denouncing capitalism while wearing Gucci shoes and a Louis Vuitton tie.

…if that don’ jes beat all. An y’ kin bet dollars ta doughnuts he didden buy em wi’ none a them there Amazon coupons I keeps hearin’ m’ niece braggin bout savin’ money with. How anybody kin talk outa both sides a his mouth llke that there, an still be sleepin’ nights, I jes don’ understan’. Hell fire, iffen I took ta actin that there way, m’ folks would be havin kme put onna funny farm, shore nuff.

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My daughter and I were both asked to make use of these sports bottles, as pictured below, and give our honest opinion. These bottles come equipped with a water bottle filter which can filter impurities, including lead and other metals, from your tap water. When they said it was supposed to filter out even that nasty chlorine taste, I was quite sure I was going to be disappointed. Imagine my pleasure when I found that their claims were absolutely true! Now, I haven’t drunk from a bottle, sports or otherwise, since I was a child. So, I simply took to filling my glass with water filtered through the bottle. I must say, I will be ordering more, and soon. This is the freshest tastingt water I have had in years!

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TRIVIA:

Frenchman Alexis Lemaire, 27, correctly calculated the 13th root of a 200 digit number in his head in only 70.2 seconds. The correct answer was 2,407,899,893,032,210.

…now, THAT be somethin ta crow about, don’ it. Most folks cain’t even understan what that be talkin about, includin me. An those what DOES understan it would be needin one a them there elliptical machines ta figger it right. Leastaways, I think that be what ya call them fancy addin machines. I could be wrong. It happened oncet or twice afore now.

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I was asked to take a moment and give an honest, straight forward review of these two flavors of Grey Poupon mustard. I really enjoy it when I get a chance to try out new things, and this was no exception. I decided to experiment a little, and the results were fantastic! Did you know that if you coat hot dogs with Hearty Spicy Brown mustard, bake them, and then serve them on regular hot dog buns, they take on a GREAT new flavor? We have a new favorite here! And the Harvest Coarse Ground adds a particularly tasty tang to baked pork chops. Looks like I am going to be making a trip to the store. I have a lot more ideas, but I used THESE two jars up in the testing! In any case, I am glad to say that I do in fact highly recommend these mustards. I invite you to try out my recipe ideas, and I hope you enjoy them!

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TRIVIA:

A 28.6 pound hailstone hit a car in Tampa, Florida in January 2007, crushing the roof.

…wowee, that be a biggun. I sure be hopin that there driver weren’t inna car, er iffen he were, I be hopin he had his medicare insurance goin’. It be t’ only kins a insurance worth havin, and I ain’t sure a that, neither. Least it only cost ya a arm, not a whole arm an a leg, like ll t’ others. Leastaways, so’s I hear. I ain’t qualified. I be old nuff, I reckon, but I ain’t never paid inta that there Social Sobriety, so I reckon they don’ wanna pay me back what they didden git nohow.

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